An article for parents, educators and teachers
As a teacher I had many parents to me and asked, "How can my son to listen to you, do not do it for me, or in the form of listening to me."
The answer is so simple. If you want to know the answer please read this article.
No means no. Now before you roll your eyes and say: "I've heard that before, I tried it and it does not work." You should read what I havetested and guaranteed to work.
I was a substitute teacher for a while 'and that he would leave for vacation and sick days and maternity cover at a day care center. So I felt really bad for children. Why should not I, I was a new teacher who was not there, so I try to watch every day, what did they get away with it.
One particular day, I had a rocking chair for kids at the playground falter set (game, among other toys). A nest of the rules, know children,very good, if you swing with a friend, I am shocked, they should not jump off the rocker, while they have their friend at the other end, in the air. They know that their friend finally crashed to the ground and could be injured.
I saw these guys do it to one of his friends. So I reminded him that we should not do it. About 15 minutes later I saw him do it again.
What would you do?
A. Give him another 2Opportunity?
B. remove it from the crib and let him play somewhere else?
C. Keep reminding the rules of the hope it will not stop?
D. ignore the situation, it's just doing it for attention. He will stop when I look the other way.
E. None of the above.
The answer is E. All decisions have given what I see are as often happens with some parents and some providers of day care centers with which I work. If I had AD, I was the baby in the air with a high risk ofalways knocked out a tooth, or falls heavily to the ground and bit his lip or tongue may be strong. And what about point B, I would put other children at risk of the child, jumped the rocker seemed in the mood to try sway'll someone hurt.
Not to mention, was deliberately disobeying a school rule was well known and was repeated for all children.
What did I do? I immediately removed the child from the area with your hand and walk hima chair in a quiet area, away from other children.
He yelled and screamed that he did not leave on time. So I was at eye level with him and said softly. "He chose to take a break" He shouted: "No, I did not." So I said quietly: "Yes, if your friend fell of the rocker told me you wanted to take a break, because you know that we get time-off for breaking the school know the rules, especially if it violates our otherFriends.
He did not know what I said a lot, so distinguished himself in time and began to walk. So I got it back in his chair. He got up and went away, so I back in his chair. He did it about 4-5 times. What did I do to show him that I was in charge? Do not give up. In many situations, which was to be terminated by the third or fourth time I've seen parents because they think it is hopeless. This is exactly what you want to think about the baby. You testTo see what can be removed. So if you give up, who know exactly what is the next time, what buttons to push, and how long it is before you give and give what they want.
Back to the situation. I spoke quietly to him: "I can do all day if you want, but then spend time playing outside with friends." He did not like very much, so he sat in his chair and screamed at me a bit '. He said he hated me and hated school.
How doFeel it when your child tells you that you hate them out for discipline or loss of privileges?
Many parents take to heart and think that their children do not really love them more or have a grudge against them forever, or to hurt them so angry, and crawling, when they hear their child, how to say harsh words to them. The important thing to remember is the hardest thing to do is take with a grain of salt.
You can grow, it makes the rulesfollowed, not broken. If you break the rules and start with him, you are basically saying that he will not listen, and let them make the rules. Their rules do not matter if you do not care for them.
If the child said he hated me and the school, I immediately said, "I love you, and the school would not be the same if you were not here."
Then I asked him why he left his friend, the rocker if he knew what were the rules. He satthere and ignored me. So I asked him again. Again no reply. Then I said: "I think you're not ready to talk with me, you can stay on a break until you are ready, my question to be answered."
He was sitting there all angry again.
Remember, he just sat there. He did not get because of how I handled the situation described above. He knew he was not competent to be in a position where he wanted.
When he calmed down I went and asked againhis friend because he dropped the saw, if he knew what were the rules. I was ignored again. I did not bother to ask for a second time, this time I say nothing, I walked away. He got all upset again so I left to calm down.
Finally I said, I'm ready to talk. But this time I said to him: "I'm not ready to buy I came to speak with you and you ignored me twice I'll be back again when I feel ready ..." He did not make a fuss this time.He's only such arms and huffed and puffed.
When I saw he was calm again, I came up and said, 'Are you ready to bring it back? "He said," Yes. "When I spoke with him, look at the ground and look and look behind me to the wall. Then I said," Please contact every time I speak to you because I know you too closely . He refused to do. Then I said: "I think I'm going to leave and come back when you are ready, look at me when I speak."
Hesaid: "No, I'm ready I'm ready."
So I asked: "Why did you skip the swing and let your friend fall to the ground?" He said: "Because it's fun." I replied: "It may sound funny, but it would be funny if it happens to you?" He said: "No." I explained once again what are the risks, the addition of these were wounded. He looked at me, while I talked to him, and when I finished, I asked him to repeat what the dangers are.
He repeated to me. I told him: "We have thisRules because we all love and not one of you bad. "Then I told her she could go play with your friends.
Needless to say, when I put the items in that class back cover, I'd never let him talk to his friends of the rocker.
And what about the fact that the child said he hated me? Well, for about the next 20 minutes or so he kept his distance from me. Then about an hour later told me he loved me. I gave him a big hug and said,I loved him. Every time you attack a position in this space, based on this situation, was one of the first to run on me and give me a hug. He told me he loves me several times during the routine of class, just out of the blue.
I do not want you to think that was the only one with which I dealt with firmly. So I have all the children, the act of dealing in anger by biting, throwing objects, damaging their friends about it and intentionally break the rules. Ito write more articles about different experiences and send them all to read. I stood my ground, though, I do not treat each child differently. Nobody special privileges, no one escapes, not even with some other child. On many occasions I have, as they can control, a class as the children hear what I say and how much fun we have to take as a class were congratulated. It works, really works. If I do not think or experience first-hand, Imight have written.
What are some effective key points of this situation that has worked?
1. I'm up to eye level of the child.
2. I remained calm throughout the situation.
3. I do not have to give up everything. I have the situation the way I wanted to go.
4. Do not give up. I got my land was to understand my point and product.
5. No matter how I felt that I must have patience and let the child makes me lose control of myEmotions or the situation
Now there are probably things in your head, such as:
1. Why such a big deal for the rocker?
2. I do not have time to do this.
3. I do not think I could have the patience for that.
We try to give them a shot after another.
# 1 If you stop and think the important thing was not really about the rocker. It 'was a situation where he wanted to take control and make his way. It took me only a fewMinutes at the end of this whole ordeal to the solution of the incident rocker. Everything in between was a power struggle, where he wanted to maintain control and see what he could get away with it.
2. It will not be a big deal for any situation. Since that incident with the child, he knows I do not give chances. I give a reminder and then will face the consequences of his actions. Every time he does something that is conscious not to accept itrespect my role as a teacher and I know I will, "Please do not return" does not get away with a simple, and then left him on his way. I can deal with him and within minutes have the problem resolved. Most of the time I can not resist the current time. If I see him always subtle, such as going to do something that is all I have to say. "I would not do if you want a break" 9 times out of 10, he stops and I teach in another activities.
3. NoPatience? After a long day of work and dealing with people and miserable boss and Road Rage, and everything else we deal with the everyday, every patient at the end of the day. The thing to keep in mind when it comes to your family, precious children, you do not want is to have a loving respect for you? It 'hard, believe me. Do you think it was easy for me to do what I did above? I was furious, I mean, snorting. I felt like around the block about 10 times onlyto communicate to my steam. But we must let go of adult children to the point where we can not control our emotions?
We must be role models. We need to teach them respect, listen, there are rules in life, to follow, and it starts at home. If our children do not respect at home, which certainly did not have outside the home.
Do your best. It is not easy. The faster you practice these things, before the hard drivePart of the road, and you will find more peace in your household and receive more love from your children. It may not happen the first time, but it will. Not a. If you really want this to engage firmly and not give you, if I can do, you can give.
** Preschool Learning For other great ideas and activities for children to teach, please visit our website: http://www.preschoollearningonline.com
No comments:
Post a Comment